Smacking your children?

[BBStr@nge]

Ur placed a hell of a lot of ur position on ur NSPCC `find'...but what is that exactly? Its a set of guidelines put out in the open market by a charity that obviously like their own ideas...and thats all they are.

No I didn't place a great deal of my position on this "find".
As stated before it is one example.


"or really I threw him down on the couch which I guess hurt a little as he started sobbing."
Goose, how else would you expect anybody to interpret that staement?

No Hogo, you called yourself that.
I stand by my original statement.

 

[BBStr@nge]

What I should say really is that I should apologise if I have offended anybody with the way I have put my viewpoint accross.
And DT, I will concede that this forum is not really here for people to "win" an argument.
This is a subject I feel particularly passionate about and I will not change my stance on something that I belive is fundamentally wrong.

 

[Rel@x]

Just a question in general here.... DT can u go one post without using a `weird thing in a quote' ?



and back to the point:

I was smacked as a kid. did fuck all use to me, i ended up hating my Dad and i still kinda do. Smacking is shit. It's the easy way out to an argument, and as I was taught @ school - violence solves nothing. And if u want some facts to back my opinion up, u can fook right off.

from CK

 

[Lightning]

im still (technically) a kid at 15 but im grown up and mature enuf that i dont hardly do anything bad enuf to get a yelling at

but when i was younger my dad slapped me a few times (2 or 3) and i can only remember 1 time and i thought it was a good lesson, and id never do anything bad like that again

(u will have to take my word on this) im mature for my age (or so im told ) and also a very quiet kid and have never gotten into any trouble and i love both my parents very much as they always go all out for me and do whats best for me and i have absolutely no hard feelings about the few times i was hit, i dont even remember it hurting or anything

now, if i ever have kids i dont kno what i will do as thats too far away, this was just my opinion on my parents discipline of me and i think they did a fantastic job

 

[Rel@x]

being hit once or twice in ur life is nothing, and imo doesnt even constitute a discussion (a thread like this wouldnt be started if it only happened once or twice to everyone).

 

[sKull]

well i have never hit my son who`s 9, coz his mum wont let me but i will admit i certainly felt like it on more than 1 occasion ,and guess wot she`s right ,take away there fun if they misbehave,he`s a gr8 kid and i`m glad i never did smack him

btw wen i was younger i was slapped punched belted ,i did`nt turn out to bad imo ,maybe i needed it

 

[Lightning]

my point was Relax that BB said no1 should hit their kid at all so 2 times counts as that, but as i was brought up with good discipline im not gonna argue becuz there is no point

 

[Rel@x]

was CK n e way

 

[Apocalypse]

"or really I threw him down on the couch which I guess hurt a little as he started sobbing."

Read sobbing, not crying, not screaming, not yelling.

Anyways, think I might go the same way as Hogo, I think these forums could end up making people fall out.

 

[RaMpaGe]

nathan is a great kid indeed.



You and annie did a great job m8.


And apoc your newphew probarly knew that he did something wrong then!



about the "hitting" !

I think bb is trying to state that it is a problem if ya hit your kid every day/week and that it well get worse.
Slap him with your first and harder harder whatever, that sucks!

just a slap with flat hand and not firmto show that he did something wrong is different!

 

[Cutter]

This is an emotive subject, so I can see why people get all het up about it.

Think of the real world: Sometimes, no matter how much you talk, and try to reason with someone, they ignore you, and you have to use violence.

The key word is moderation. If you spank a child for every minor misdemeanor, they learn nothing.

But, if you give them a sharp twack on the bottom (where it will sting but do no actual damage) for something serious, it soon brings the point across. Most kids will realise if you ar being fair or just hitting them for the sake of it.

Now, in these forums, I'm one of the "parents". So, you "kids" will all get along and be polite to each other, or you'll get the digital equivalent of a sharp spank on the bottom!

 

[sKull]

well it seems to me there arguments for both physical discipline,and non physical disipline ,if i had my sisters son i would knock the fookin shit out of him coz he`s 1 evil little shit ,and the parents do not neglect him he just wont listen to reason 11 yoa,i think 90% of kids would behave better with a little slap wen ther young ,but some kids can not be controlled and thats were things go wrong coz parents would just hit harder like bb says ,it`s spotting the kids that need the help

btw thx ramp,it`s nice wen ppl comment on ur kids good behaviour

 

[sKull]

Originally posted by Rel@x
Just a question in general here.... DT can u go one post without using a `weird thing in a quote' ?



and back to the point:

I was smacked as a kid. did fuck all use to me, i ended up hating my Dad and i still kinda do. Smacking is shit. It's the easy way out to an argument, and as I was taught @ school - violence solves nothing. And if u want some facts to back my opinion up, u can fook right off.

from CK

wot would u do to a kid who set couch on fire ,like i did at 7 years of age ,well my dad fookin wacked me big time ,but i did`nt do it again

 

[BBStr@nge]

Can't agree with all you say Skull.
But you have made an interesting point.
Spotting the kids that need the help is vital.

I was a little bastard for a period as a kid. It coincided with some nasty shit that happened to me and my stepfather being a general bastard.

I had a long period in my life where no-one gave me a chance and completely wrote me off.
I had no help and no positive input from anybody.

I personally can't agree with hitting children regardless.
I can agree with wanting to. My son is the most opinionated, sarcastic and defiant kid at times (must get it from his Mother),
but I have never hit him.
He will have his dark times and he may go off the rails, that is the natural course of life. But I am confident he will grow up into a well rounded, thoughtfull individual.
Mainly because he will always know he has parents who love him.
And I would hope I will never raise my hand to him in anger.

 

[sKull]

the thing about this thread is it`s impossible to agree coz everybody was raised with different experiences

 

[BBStr@nge]

Am glad you edited your post Skull-don't not post over difference of opinion. I am particularly passionate about this issue.
Probably why it is like hitting your head against a brick wall for me and others as well.

 

[sKull]

looks like all u guys turned out ok,maybe a few drink ,smoke drugs porn ,prbs but hey nobody`s perfect

 

[Rich]

if god says its ok ?

 

[Twonko]

Only just discovered this thread so I'm way behind.

With you every step of the way BB. There is NO excuse for ever striking a child. Having said that, I smacked my daughter once. Once. And I will take that moment to my grave. The reason I did it was because I lost my cool and had no other option. My fault. My inability to deal with a difficult situation. Not her fault and in another life I wouldn't do it. Violence against children is not acceptable and not justifiable. I send my daughter to her room (rarely) where she switches on the comp or plays gameboy or reads or just fucks about. But she still sees it as a punishment because her choice has been removed. That's enough and no harm done. She has big respect for me (unlike you fucking lotand that is a fuck sight better than fear.

 

[Jay]

I think that there is a vast difference between hitting and smacking a child.

IMO for an adult to hit a child means to cause them physical pain. Where as a smack is more of a shock to the system.

When I was a child I was smacked and it did me no harm at all. But smacking only works when they are little, as soon as i was old enough to reason and understand i was put i a position to explain my actions and what I had done.

This was much more daunting.

Anyway, in essence, i agree with a gentle smack as a shock treatment. I wouldnt agree to a hit under any circumstances.