Most boring joke ever.
- Thread starter sneez
- Start date
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Even worse 1 than that
I had a car accident the other day on my usual route into work. i was fuckin nackered and spaced at the lights, thus cracking the arse of this vauxall corsa. This dwarf gets out, he couldn't have been over 3 foot high. he walked up to my car so i got out, then he shouts "I'm not happy"
So i Shouted "well which one are you then"
I had a car accident the other day on my usual route into work. i was fuckin nackered and spaced at the lights, thus cracking the arse of this vauxall corsa. This dwarf gets out, he couldn't have been over 3 foot high. he walked up to my car so i got out, then he shouts "I'm not happy"
So i Shouted "well which one are you then"
A bloke is driving happily along in his car with his girlfriend when he's pulled over by the police. The police officer approaches him and asks, "Have you been drinking Sir?"
"No. Why?" replies the man. "Was I all over the road?"
"No," replies the officer, "your driving was fine, sir. It was the ugly fat bird in the passenger seat that made me suspicious."
Thanks folks im here all day
"No. Why?" replies the man. "Was I all over the road?"
"No," replies the officer, "your driving was fine, sir. It was the ugly fat bird in the passenger seat that made me suspicious."
Thanks folks im here all day
@ both
Little Tommy wakes up in the middle of the night and goes the toilet, he looks into his mum and dad's room and he can see them engaged in sex, shocked Tommy goes back to bed.
The following morning he says to his mum
"I saw you jumping on top of Dad last night whats was you doing?"
The mum taking aback by this quick as a flash says
"I was flattening your Dads tummy, because he's fat"
Timmy replies
"Well thats no good because when you go to work Auntie Joan come round and blows him back up!"
The following morning he says to his mum
"I saw you jumping on top of Dad last night whats was you doing?"
The mum taking aback by this quick as a flash says
"I was flattening your Dads tummy, because he's fat"
Timmy replies
"Well thats no good because when you go to work Auntie Joan come round and blows him back up!"
A man and his wife were working in their garden one day and the man looks over at his wife and says: "Your butt is getting really big, I mean really big. I bet your butt is bigger than the barbecue."
With that he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measure the grill and then went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife's bottom.
"Yes, I was right; your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!
The woman chose to ignore her husbands comments.
Later that night in bed, the husband is feeling a little frisky.
He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off.
"What's wrong?" he asks.
She answers: "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one little weenie?"
With that he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measure the grill and then went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife's bottom.
"Yes, I was right; your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!
The woman chose to ignore her husbands comments.
Later that night in bed, the husband is feeling a little frisky.
He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off.
"What's wrong?" he asks.
She answers: "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one little weenie?"
